Message In A Bottle On The Shore Of A Desert Island


Aqidah Akhtar

Runner up, age 8-11 short story category

Hi, my name is Aqidah, and I am going to tell you my story. One day I wanted to go fishing at the beach with my boat, but my friend advised me not to go into the sea because the water was going to get high, and the wind would be much stronger; I didn’t listen to her because I was so excited to fish for the first time. I was even more excited to see all the amazing creatures in the sea.

I thought my friend would come along but she told me she wanted to be back at home. So, I said my goodbyes and I left, everything was going great until… I noticed that everything my friend had said was happening. The waves were getting higher, the wind was getting stronger and now I was anxious for what was to come.

As I tried to hold the boat together, I noticed that it had a hole and was filling up rapidly. It started to feel as deep as a pool. I noticed that my hands were getting moist, and the boat was sinking. Eventually I lost hope and felt there was nothing that I could do that would help me. I sat there in the boat that was half broken, sitting there in the shivering cold and trying not to think of what would happen to me. If only I had one wish; it would be to go home.

Suddenly the most amazing thing happened, I found my way to an island. The island was gargantuan and there would be somewhere I could find shelter. So, I crouched down and began to edge closer and closer to the middle of the island. When I got to the middle I saw the most unusual thing on the island, it was an abandoned house. I could not see very well but I could feel the pollution in the air.

As I came close, I was able to see a chair and a fire that looked as if it had just been blown out by the wind that I could hear howling as it surrounded me. As I was so tired and had been walking for what felt like forever, had not eaten anything for the past 48 hours I could just take a seat down for only a short period of time. One hour had passed and I had just woken up, looked around and it seemed different, something didn’t feel right. I knew I had only been in there for roughly 2 hours but I was able to tell that there was something missing that was there before but what could it be?

I was beginning to feel very worried but there was nothing I could possibly say when I am the one stuck in the middle of an unknown island and there is nothing, I could possibly do about it. As I told this all to myself, I couldn’t help but think of my friend Evie. Now what….

There wasn’t anything I could possibly do about it. I didn’t want to cry because then that would make me feel very guilty about coming to fish in the first place but there was no hope what was done and there is nothing I could do about it.

I began to search the room to figure out what was happening or what I could bring back as proof of what I had been through if I even got out of this trauma.

Then suddenly out of nowhere the door slammed shut and my stomach began to get butterflies. I slowly walked to the door hoping that is had not locked me inside, but it was for sure going to be shut. My mum used to tell me that I should never lose hope, she said it because I always found a way to lose my things that i was desperate to find but I thought that it was just because she didn’t want things hidden in her house so that people could just find it and be weirded out.

I grabbed the door after counting to three and it wouldn’t open. I felt like I was going to faint, sweat going down my forehead. I tried and tried but it was no use. I didn’t try for too long because there was no water there and I would have needed it if I got tired.

I felt hopeless I always believed my mum that I would find the things I lost which I did but this time there was no hope in my world and the only thing I had was guilt and hunger. My throat was dry my lips where crust and I felt as if I was going to choke my way to defeat. I had to beat it all.

There was nothing I could do about this incident, and I never believed in magic but my grandma did before she died, she would tell me” Aqidah there is hope and magic in the world so get yourself up and listen to the music in the sky”.

I tried to listen closely to the chair I fell asleep in, but it wasn’t anything happy, it was screams. Loudly, I began to scream with it, but it just made me cry and soon washed myself up in the horrible feeling around me.

There was no way anyone would find me because I was always the best at geography in my family and year group but if I could not figure out where I was then there was not a high chance anyone else would know where I was.

The wind was getting loud, and the rain was hitting the rusty windows like someone angry would knock on your door. I was shivering in the freezing cold weather, if only I had listened to my friend’s words, then I would be at home enjoying a nice cup of tea and sitting by the fire.


Thinking of that made me think that not knowing what my friends, family and others are feeling could have made them terrified and now they must be worried sick, and others might even think I was dead. If only I could let them know somehow that I was still alive.

I began to start my search again since there was no point in listening to horrible screams anymore. Was I ever going to get out of that house? I looked at the back of the fireplace and figured there was going to be something there, and in fact there was. It was a piece of paper that looked like it had been there for many years or so. I found it near the edge of the paper there was nothing on the side I looked on but when I flipped it over, I was petrified. It was a message from someone named Shadow…

It read “Dear whoever finds this message. My name is Shadow if you find this you need to know you are in grave danger. I don’t have a lot of time to tell you this, but I will be quick, I went exploring in this island looking to find something valuable that I could use to help pay for my mother’s surgery. This is Lost Island a place where no one has dared to come or if someone went, they never returned. They didn’t even put it on the map.

You might be stuck here. The person who locked you in is a man who isn’t afraid to kill anyone that crosses his path.BE AWARE!!I will be killed when the man comes, if you read this know that there is one way to get out of this island; first get the key, it is hidden in the kettle, the man hid it horribly. I hope you escape. After you get out of the house go somewhere where the water falls and flows to the sea, but it isn’t the sea.”

I knew that whoever sent that had died because there was dried out blood on the bottom of the page. I wish that Shadow didn’t die but I had a plan I would kill the man before he did to anyone else.

It was strange, I didn’t normally feel bad for anyone except myself, but I couldn’t stop thinking about how Shadow had died. I didn’t think there was anything else there near the fire, so I crept quietly to the kettle and opened it, but it wasn’t a key nor lock or pin, but it was a small note. And I could not believe what I had seen, I did not feel sorry for Shadow at all anymore. The note said in capital letters,” ha ha ha you fell for it”.

I was astonished Shadow wasn’t trying to help me at all! In fact, he was doing the complete opposite! It shocked me to even think that he was the one who had me. I was also curious and questioning one other thing; whose blood was on the paper…?

My stomach felt like it was going you crawl up my throat and out of my mouth. I was petrified and knew that I had to find the key, or I would have some severe issues. I was gobsmacked, there was nothing I could possibly do other than search for more notes and hints. In the corner of my eye, I saw something that I thought was quite unusual (I thought that the whole house was unusual really) but this was more unusual than I had thought at the time.

There was a worn down and dusty wardrobe in the back of the room but this wardrobe had a tiny hole in the door which wasn’t very in it but I could slightly see something red dripping out of the wardrobe from the bottom and a huge puddle of red liquid on the floor. What could it be? Was it blood? I slowly approached the wardrobe whilst reaching out my hand and grabbed the doorknob and pulled it slowly. I felt like my heart was not in my chest, I could barely describe the feeling I had…

It was a body. The body of a little girl, blood dripping from her hand that had been sliced. Her eyes were wide open with one tear coming from her eye. I now knew why I had to get the key but I was too impatient. I grabbed the kettle and threw it into the window as hard as I could. I climbed out and ran as fast as I could and I didn’t let anyone stop me, not once did I turn my head back.

I had no idea what Lost Island had in store for me or what creatures laid beneath the forest trees but I ran in anyway. I hid under a branch for shade and looked at the plants eager to eat anything since it felt like days since food was around. I collected a lot of big sticks and laid them down on the ground, using another stick to smoothen out the branches. Then I collected 50 giant leaves and put them on the sticks. I had no cover but there was no need for it since the sun looked like it was not going to come down anytime soon.

The next morning was rough, I had found a giant slice on my back and it looked as if it needed to be covered. So I ripped off a part of my top and wrapped it around my cut. It felt like I was never going to be able to move my back again.

Now, you are probably wondering how this story is getting to you but you will just have to find out in my next story ok. Think about something, who is Shadow. What is he like? I must keep cover and not make a single sound otherwise he will come for me…